Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Hogzilla

I watched part of a show yesterday on National Geographic Channel on Hogzilla. For those of you who haven't heard of Hogzilla:
Snopes.com version of Hogzilla story
National Geographic.com picture gallery of dead Hogzilla's grave
I am positive that the shot of the dead rotting carcass of Hogzilla with the cleaned-off Hogzilla skull next to it prompted part of my dead horse dream (see below). Hogzilla turned out to be part wild boar and part Hampshire pig.
I have to wonder about pigs. Supposedly, well-prepared human flesh tastes "just like pork" (the other-other white meat? Haven't you heard of "long pork"?). Heart valves from pigs work just fine in human bodies, and I think they might use other pig parts too. But monkeys are our closest relatives? I don't get it.
I really hate the SMELL of pigs. Whenever I go to the Big E (a major fair up in Springfield Mass) and go near the pigs, I am so grossed out by the smell that I can't eat pork for weeks. I don't feel this way about the cows, who I always pet and thank for being so delicious. I think subconsciously I know that if I laid around in my own filth for long enough, I would smell just like a pig.
And one time in my life, I DID smell like a pig. Honestly.
I had a wound cauterized. I wasn't looking. I was staring into space, thinking about pizza. The reason I was thinking about pizza is because I was SMELLING pizza--well, pepperoni anyway. I've never liked pepperoni much, but this day I was craving it so badly I could smell it...
No.
That was MY ARM BURNING.
When you burn me, I smell like pepperoni.
That's the long version of why I don't eat pepperoni. The short version is, "It's too greasy."

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