I overheard a disturbing conversation at school this week.
Two people started talking about their projects for class. One woman was doing something for her church. Which is fine, and very nice of her. The two got into a discussion of their churches. They were making no attempt to moderate their voices or keep the conversation private, I might add.
The woman said her church encourages homosexuals to join and tells them they can "be themselves" but then preaches to them heavily about how they are sinners going to hell and all kinds of crap. She said this provokes "overnight" conversions back to being straight and all the former gays and lesbians in their church are now married with kids and understand how disgusting they were before in their perversions.
So she is advocating converting people to her "non denominial bible study" AND forcing them to relinquish their biologically programmed sexual identity. That's really tolerant of her. Then again, she claimed that when she was "7" she "knew" the Catholic church was wrong because they were all idol worshippers. When I was 7 I was trying to cast spells. Hmm. Makes you wonder if religion is innate?
Another person sitting nearby brought up Santeria, for reasons I didn't hear, and she jumped all over him. "It's a statue in the corner with a circle of salt. Think about it."
Okay, I'm thinking. What is supposed to come to mind, exactly?
The guy said something about it being a 5,000 year old religion (not true) and she dismissed it as "Satan worship". Kindly explain how a circle of salt equals satan? Demon salt?
I was sitting there with my pen with advertises my friend's witch craft shop and just wanting to lob it across the room into this woman's eye. Or drop it on her desk during break.
But I did neither, and I didn't say anything either.
It's funny, I got a bad feeling from her when I walked in. I ended up having to ask her a question (before I heard the discussion) and I didn't even want to talk to her.
Friday, September 29, 2006
Bits of a dream
12.19.13.12.5 4 Chicchan 18 Chen
Happy burner day.
In the dream I had this morning, Willy and I lived in a different house. It was old and ramshackle, but large.
We must have just moved in because we were still discovering everything about it. I had a small Siamese cat and a ferret. I would never own a ferret but it seemed like someone had given him to me as a gift.
Beth had come over to help me clean up and move things around. In the backyard we found this large wire pen. Off the pen were 3 smaller shed-like structures, but open fronted, almost like stalls for animals. There were blackberry bushes growing everywhere with ripe fruit and I made a mental note to call my dad who loves blackberries.
I don't remember HOW we found it, but we found a very young raccoon who was somehow wrapped in wire. Not loose wire but wire fencing, made of 3" or 4" squares. The wire had cut into the animal's skin and it was bleeding and infected. First we trapped the raccoon in the basement but my cat was down there and we were afraid they would fight. So we got the cat out of there and went to call the dog warden. It was a strange town (not one I know now) and the dog warden wasn't listed in the blue pages so we were looking in the white pages but couldn't find it there either so I decided to shove the raccoon into a cat carrier and take him to the vet, who treats wildlife for free. I hoped they wouldn't put him to sleep and I had vague hopes of getting him to live in the shed area as a kind of pet.
I brought him to the vet and when I came back Beth and Will had made a huge advance in cleaning. They had torn down the wire fence and pens, to my dismay, but set up a kind of outside party area, with 3 walls of shelves under a roof, which housed stereo equipment and other stuff. There were two white appliances out there too, not dissimilar to a washer and dryer, which they weren't, but I can't remember what they WERE, only that it made sense at the time for them to be out there. There was a fridge out there too.
In another part of the yard they had set up this weird little shooting range. People were coming over and paying us $10 to shoot these clear plastic disks at each other. It was very strange. There was a gay black man there shooting who was from a different dream I also had last night.
In that dream I was in an airport and one of my friends flipped out and attacked a security person for reasons I don't remember. They dressed her in camo and put a sash on her with a bunch of foreign words written on it. One of them was Reiki (she was a Reiki person). Security took a bunch of pictures and video of her dressed like that. Then I got mad and tried to rescue her. The black guy was there and I punched him in the crotch and told him he had a tiny penis (I felt it when I punched him) and to my surprise he thought that was funny and laughed and agreed.
Happy burner day.
In the dream I had this morning, Willy and I lived in a different house. It was old and ramshackle, but large.
We must have just moved in because we were still discovering everything about it. I had a small Siamese cat and a ferret. I would never own a ferret but it seemed like someone had given him to me as a gift.
Beth had come over to help me clean up and move things around. In the backyard we found this large wire pen. Off the pen were 3 smaller shed-like structures, but open fronted, almost like stalls for animals. There were blackberry bushes growing everywhere with ripe fruit and I made a mental note to call my dad who loves blackberries.
I don't remember HOW we found it, but we found a very young raccoon who was somehow wrapped in wire. Not loose wire but wire fencing, made of 3" or 4" squares. The wire had cut into the animal's skin and it was bleeding and infected. First we trapped the raccoon in the basement but my cat was down there and we were afraid they would fight. So we got the cat out of there and went to call the dog warden. It was a strange town (not one I know now) and the dog warden wasn't listed in the blue pages so we were looking in the white pages but couldn't find it there either so I decided to shove the raccoon into a cat carrier and take him to the vet, who treats wildlife for free. I hoped they wouldn't put him to sleep and I had vague hopes of getting him to live in the shed area as a kind of pet.
I brought him to the vet and when I came back Beth and Will had made a huge advance in cleaning. They had torn down the wire fence and pens, to my dismay, but set up a kind of outside party area, with 3 walls of shelves under a roof, which housed stereo equipment and other stuff. There were two white appliances out there too, not dissimilar to a washer and dryer, which they weren't, but I can't remember what they WERE, only that it made sense at the time for them to be out there. There was a fridge out there too.
In another part of the yard they had set up this weird little shooting range. People were coming over and paying us $10 to shoot these clear plastic disks at each other. It was very strange. There was a gay black man there shooting who was from a different dream I also had last night.
In that dream I was in an airport and one of my friends flipped out and attacked a security person for reasons I don't remember. They dressed her in camo and put a sash on her with a bunch of foreign words written on it. One of them was Reiki (she was a Reiki person). Security took a bunch of pictures and video of her dressed like that. Then I got mad and tried to rescue her. The black guy was there and I punched him in the crotch and told him he had a tiny penis (I felt it when I punched him) and to my surprise he thought that was funny and laughed and agreed.
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Olmec writing found & the paths not taken
12.19.13.11.17 9 Caban 10 Chen
I saw this article a few days ago and meant to write about it. Then I got insane with my calendar and forgot all about it. Until last night.
Last night I went to a speech at Yale/Peabody by Dr Michael Coe, a famous archeologist who has excavated a lot of Mayan and Olmec sites. He wrote his autobiography and the presentation was bits of it (very interesting life). He started talking about this slab and showed a photo of it and drawings of the writing and told about how some "guardian" is keeping it safe deep in some out-of-the-way little village in Mexico.
An ancient slab of green stone inscribed with insects, ears of corn, fish and other symbols is indecipherable so far, but one message is clear: It is the earliest known writing in the Western Hemisphere. The ancient Olmec civilization probably produced the faintly etched symbols around 900 B.C., or roughly three centuries before what previously had been proposed as the earliest examples of writing in the Americas. The pattern of symbols covering the face of the rectangular block also represents a previously unknown ancient writing system. The text contains 28 distinct glyphs or symbols, some of which are repeated three and four times. The writing system does not appear to be linked to any known later scripts and may represent a dead end....
The weirdest thing happened when I walked into the audotorium. I saw a lot of people I thought I knew. (I did figure out that one guy was on the board of Yale Broadcasting when I worked there, but the others...?) The first person to catch my eye was an old guy at the end of the back row. I said, "there's that guy" but I couldn't remember his name--seemed like James but maybe not. I figured he was probably a volunteer back when I worked at Peabody for a summer playing with dinosaur bones.
Then the MC called Dr Coe up...and he was "that guy" and I've NEVER met Michael Coe in my life. In the pictures I've seen of him he has a beard and he's much younger--this was an elderly clean-shaven guy.
I got a funny feeling as he talked--a "this could have been your life" kind of thing. Half-remembered events I wasn't at. Not really like deja-vu. I'm not doing a good job explaining it at all.
When I was little that's what I wanted to do. Be an archeologist or a paleontologist. I let people talk me out of it. And then I wanted to go into genetics but at that time it wasn't offered as a major anywhere and where it was offered it was only a minor if that. I didn't want to major in BIOLOGY, I wanted to know about genetic manipulation. So I fell back into writing. Not that writing is bad. But I just sometimes sense those other paths. I can only hope that in parallel dimensions some other versions of me did take those paths.
I did get Dr Coe's email address.
I saw this article a few days ago and meant to write about it. Then I got insane with my calendar and forgot all about it. Until last night.
Last night I went to a speech at Yale/Peabody by Dr Michael Coe, a famous archeologist who has excavated a lot of Mayan and Olmec sites. He wrote his autobiography and the presentation was bits of it (very interesting life). He started talking about this slab and showed a photo of it and drawings of the writing and told about how some "guardian" is keeping it safe deep in some out-of-the-way little village in Mexico.
An ancient slab of green stone inscribed with insects, ears of corn, fish and other symbols is indecipherable so far, but one message is clear: It is the earliest known writing in the Western Hemisphere. The ancient Olmec civilization probably produced the faintly etched symbols around 900 B.C., or roughly three centuries before what previously had been proposed as the earliest examples of writing in the Americas. The pattern of symbols covering the face of the rectangular block also represents a previously unknown ancient writing system. The text contains 28 distinct glyphs or symbols, some of which are repeated three and four times. The writing system does not appear to be linked to any known later scripts and may represent a dead end....
The weirdest thing happened when I walked into the audotorium. I saw a lot of people I thought I knew. (I did figure out that one guy was on the board of Yale Broadcasting when I worked there, but the others...?) The first person to catch my eye was an old guy at the end of the back row. I said, "there's that guy" but I couldn't remember his name--seemed like James but maybe not. I figured he was probably a volunteer back when I worked at Peabody for a summer playing with dinosaur bones.
Then the MC called Dr Coe up...and he was "that guy" and I've NEVER met Michael Coe in my life. In the pictures I've seen of him he has a beard and he's much younger--this was an elderly clean-shaven guy.
I got a funny feeling as he talked--a "this could have been your life" kind of thing. Half-remembered events I wasn't at. Not really like deja-vu. I'm not doing a good job explaining it at all.
When I was little that's what I wanted to do. Be an archeologist or a paleontologist. I let people talk me out of it. And then I wanted to go into genetics but at that time it wasn't offered as a major anywhere and where it was offered it was only a minor if that. I didn't want to major in BIOLOGY, I wanted to know about genetic manipulation. So I fell back into writing. Not that writing is bad. But I just sometimes sense those other paths. I can only hope that in parallel dimensions some other versions of me did take those paths.
I did get Dr Coe's email address.
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Jaguar Nights 2007 is now in print, and a rant
I was just in Staples having Jaguar Nights 2007 printed up. It affected me so strongly, so unexpectedly, to see my name and picture above an ISBN. Seriously, I almost started to cry right there in the copy center. When I came back to work and kept thinking about it I DID cry, for just a minute, and then I felt stupid, and then I was angry at myself for feeling stupid. This is a life-long goal of mine and I can feel any damn way I please about it. I can cry or laugh or get a tattoo. Or do all 3.
But now I have to pause to do a serious rant against Staples.
I like Staples. I used to work there, at that very Staples, with some of the same people who still work there. I know for a fact that the copy center is 95-100% profit. (That is not a misprint.)
My decision was to print the calendar pages myself, on the self-serve copiers, and then have it bound by the Copy Center desk. I went there last week and picked out the paper I wanted and the cardstock for the cover. Today I bought a package of each (with a packet of stickers, total cost $20), lugged it over to the self-service copiers and went to town, making 7 calendars to start. I'm glad I only made 7 because I'm not crazy about the paper I chose now that I see it printed up--it's too flimsy.
210 black and white copies and 14 color copies later, I carried my carefully hand-collated calendars to the desk for binding. I was going to pay for the copies then but the woman waiting on me (who knows me by name since I used to work with her) said that I could pay later, at the same time as the binding. That's fine, one less check I have to write out.
She asked me what kind of covers I wanted. I explained that I printed my covers on cardstock so no covers were needed. She frowned and flipped through my books as she wrote down the totals. I pointed out that I used my own paper and asked if I got a discount.
Is that unreasonable? I used their ink and their electricity, and my paper.
Not only do I NOT get a discount...I get charged EXTRA.
I have to pay for cardstock copies EVEN THOUGH I PAID FOR THE CARDSTOCK SEPARATELY. I have to pay for colored-paper copies EVEN THOUGH I BOUGHT A REAM OF COLORED PAPER.
That is TOTAL BULLSHIT.
I have to figure out where else I can go to get these printed.
Anyway, Jaguar Nights 2007 NOW IN STOCK. Order today.
But now I have to pause to do a serious rant against Staples.
I like Staples. I used to work there, at that very Staples, with some of the same people who still work there. I know for a fact that the copy center is 95-100% profit. (That is not a misprint.)
My decision was to print the calendar pages myself, on the self-serve copiers, and then have it bound by the Copy Center desk. I went there last week and picked out the paper I wanted and the cardstock for the cover. Today I bought a package of each (with a packet of stickers, total cost $20), lugged it over to the self-service copiers and went to town, making 7 calendars to start. I'm glad I only made 7 because I'm not crazy about the paper I chose now that I see it printed up--it's too flimsy.
210 black and white copies and 14 color copies later, I carried my carefully hand-collated calendars to the desk for binding. I was going to pay for the copies then but the woman waiting on me (who knows me by name since I used to work with her) said that I could pay later, at the same time as the binding. That's fine, one less check I have to write out.
She asked me what kind of covers I wanted. I explained that I printed my covers on cardstock so no covers were needed. She frowned and flipped through my books as she wrote down the totals. I pointed out that I used my own paper and asked if I got a discount.
Is that unreasonable? I used their ink and their electricity, and my paper.
Not only do I NOT get a discount...I get charged EXTRA.
I have to pay for cardstock copies EVEN THOUGH I PAID FOR THE CARDSTOCK SEPARATELY. I have to pay for colored-paper copies EVEN THOUGH I BOUGHT A REAM OF COLORED PAPER.
That is TOTAL BULLSHIT.
I have to figure out where else I can go to get these printed.
Anyway, Jaguar Nights 2007 NOW IN STOCK. Order today.
Friday, September 15, 2006
3d White Buffalo Calf born on same farm
12.19.13.11.11 3 Chuen 4 Chen
Cross posted
Funny that in this time of global warming and global extinction, a sign of world peace is born. Maybe it's not too late after all.
A farm in Wisconsin is quickly becoming hallowed ground for American Indians with the birth of its third white buffalo, an animal considered sacred by many tribes for its potential to bring good fortune and peace. .... Thousands of people stopped by Heider's Janesville farm after the birth of the first white buffalo, a female named Miracle who died in 2004 at the age of 10. The second was born in 1996 but died after three days. Heider said he discovered the third white buffalo, a newborn male, after a storm in late August. That this latest birth is a male doesn't make it any less significant in American Indian prophecies, which say that such an animal will reunite all the races of man and restore balance to the world, (Floyd "Looks for Buffalo" Hand, a medicine man in the Oglala Sioux Tribe)said. He said the buffalo's coat will change from white to black, red and yellow, the colors of the various races of man, before turning brown again. The birth of a white male buffalo means men need to take responsibility for their families and the future of the tribe, Hand said. ....The odds of a white buffalo are at least 1 in a million.Story & Image source
Cross posted
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Jaguar Nights 2007 Wall Calendar
12.19.13.11.10 2 Oc 3 Chen Intention Portal
It's close enough to being finished that I can offermy Jaguar Nights 2007 Wall Calendar for pre-sale. See the sidebar or my main web site for a handy dandy buy-it-now button. I'm not putting on in this post because this particular buy-it-now button features FREE SHIPPING that's right FREE SHIPPING if you pre-order your Jaguar Nights 2007 wall calendar. For a LIMITED TIME ONLY so order quick and save yourself a few bucks. Maybe enough to buy a gallon of gas, who knows?
It's close enough to being finished that I can offermy Jaguar Nights 2007 Wall Calendar for pre-sale. See the sidebar or my main web site for a handy dandy buy-it-now button. I'm not putting on in this post because this particular buy-it-now button features FREE SHIPPING that's right FREE SHIPPING if you pre-order your Jaguar Nights 2007 wall calendar. For a LIMITED TIME ONLY so order quick and save yourself a few bucks. Maybe enough to buy a gallon of gas, who knows?
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Goddess dream
12.19.13.11.9 1 Muluc 2 Chen
This morning the Goddess came to me in a dream. The dream itself was odd but not remarkably so, up to that point. It was a large old building of some kind--school, enormous house, school that used to be an enormous house, something like that--and there was someone doing a combination magic/mesmerism act. In fact it may have been a school to learn magic/mesmerism. There was a zoo next door. In this world it was the fashion to have enormous versions of common animals in zoos--they were overfed and overbred to get this way. Right next to the building was the zoo's exhibit of giant iguanas. These iguanas were at least 20 feet long. Somehow they broke out of their exhibit and came in through some open windows and were terrorizing this other building. In real life a green iguana is a quiet thing. A wild one will run from humans. They have very sharp claws, like kitten claws only much larger, but they don't really attack with them, just hold on. They are vegetarian. These iguanas were fearless and omnivorous, chasing people down and eating them. Little pockets of people tried to barricade themselves in various rooms and call for help, but the thick walls limited cell phone contact and the iguanas would batter down the door.
If you are getting a kind of 50's movie feeling about this, yes, that's what it looked like, but the "graphics" were seamless.
The main magician/teacher, a woman, opened a hidden door which led into a basement. I just went into my basement and there are 11 steps. This dream basement had more steps, but not a lot more. 13? 15? Definitely an odd number. At the bottom of the steps was a stone wall to the front and left, so you could only go right. This was a kind of typical old fashioned basement room except that beneath the stairs were stacked cases of Nag Champa incense. The room continued on into the gloom behind and around the stairs. Somehow I know that if a person kept walking, the room behind and around the stairs was more like a cave, and you could walk forever, spiraling down into the earth. But the dream didn't take me there. (Not that "I" was there except as a camera; I wasn't a character.)
The teacher, who was young, in her 20's, bowed her head and waited. She had a student with her, a teenage girl who had no idea where she was. And then the Goddess came around the spiral from behind the stairs. She appeared to be in her 40's. She had dark hair, to just below her shoulders, with a little bit of wave. Her face was perfect--she didn't look 20 but she wasn't wrinkled or anything either. Her body was softly rounded (not pregnant) under some kind of flowing garment. At first she wasn't happy that the teacher had brought a student but the teacher explained about the lizards.
I find this interesting, that the goddess didn't know about the lizards until she was told. It makes me wonder about the omnipotence of the gods. Do they only know what they are TOLD? Are they not actually watching us all the time? Then again, it's a huge job to watch people 24/7 so maybe they do depend on us to tell them the important things.
It seemed like the Goddess couldn't leave the basement but she did promise to help somehow. I woke up shortly after that but it seemed like the teacher left some men in the Goddess's basement grotto which pissed her off and maybe the teacher got eaten or imprisoned by the lizards, leaving the teenager in charge.
I know if I didn't get woken up I wouldn't remember, but I wish I knew more.
This morning the Goddess came to me in a dream. The dream itself was odd but not remarkably so, up to that point. It was a large old building of some kind--school, enormous house, school that used to be an enormous house, something like that--and there was someone doing a combination magic/mesmerism act. In fact it may have been a school to learn magic/mesmerism. There was a zoo next door. In this world it was the fashion to have enormous versions of common animals in zoos--they were overfed and overbred to get this way. Right next to the building was the zoo's exhibit of giant iguanas. These iguanas were at least 20 feet long. Somehow they broke out of their exhibit and came in through some open windows and were terrorizing this other building. In real life a green iguana is a quiet thing. A wild one will run from humans. They have very sharp claws, like kitten claws only much larger, but they don't really attack with them, just hold on. They are vegetarian. These iguanas were fearless and omnivorous, chasing people down and eating them. Little pockets of people tried to barricade themselves in various rooms and call for help, but the thick walls limited cell phone contact and the iguanas would batter down the door.
If you are getting a kind of 50's movie feeling about this, yes, that's what it looked like, but the "graphics" were seamless.
The main magician/teacher, a woman, opened a hidden door which led into a basement. I just went into my basement and there are 11 steps. This dream basement had more steps, but not a lot more. 13? 15? Definitely an odd number. At the bottom of the steps was a stone wall to the front and left, so you could only go right. This was a kind of typical old fashioned basement room except that beneath the stairs were stacked cases of Nag Champa incense. The room continued on into the gloom behind and around the stairs. Somehow I know that if a person kept walking, the room behind and around the stairs was more like a cave, and you could walk forever, spiraling down into the earth. But the dream didn't take me there. (Not that "I" was there except as a camera; I wasn't a character.)
The teacher, who was young, in her 20's, bowed her head and waited. She had a student with her, a teenage girl who had no idea where she was. And then the Goddess came around the spiral from behind the stairs. She appeared to be in her 40's. She had dark hair, to just below her shoulders, with a little bit of wave. Her face was perfect--she didn't look 20 but she wasn't wrinkled or anything either. Her body was softly rounded (not pregnant) under some kind of flowing garment. At first she wasn't happy that the teacher had brought a student but the teacher explained about the lizards.
I find this interesting, that the goddess didn't know about the lizards until she was told. It makes me wonder about the omnipotence of the gods. Do they only know what they are TOLD? Are they not actually watching us all the time? Then again, it's a huge job to watch people 24/7 so maybe they do depend on us to tell them the important things.
It seemed like the Goddess couldn't leave the basement but she did promise to help somehow. I woke up shortly after that but it seemed like the teacher left some men in the Goddess's basement grotto which pissed her off and maybe the teacher got eaten or imprisoned by the lizards, leaving the teenager in charge.
I know if I didn't get woken up I wouldn't remember, but I wish I knew more.
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Back to the dinosaur age
12.19.13.11.5 10 Chicchan 18 Mol
Lately it seems like this blog is turning into a "global warming" (I type "warning" at first, what a Freudian slip) blog. That's not my intent. It's just what I've been seeing. I've put some stuff on my other blog too, about mass animal extinction.
Source. Global warming over the coming century could mean a return of temperatures last seen in the age of the dinosaur and lead to the extinction of up to half of all species....Not only will carbon dioxide levels be at the highest levels for 24 million years, but global average temperatures will be higher than for up to 10 million years...Between 10 and 99 percent of species will be faced with atmospheric conditions that last existed before they evolved, and as a result from 10-50 percent of them could disappear....Scientific observations had already found that -- as predicted by the climate models -- 80 percent of species had already begun moving their traditional territorial ranges in response to the changing climatic conditions....Not only had the animals, birds and insects started to react, but there was evidence vegetation was also on the move.Not only would some species simply find no suitable space to live anymore, but there would be confrontations with invasive species being forced to move their territory. This would produce not just wipe-outs but species' mixtures never seen before.
Makes me think of the polar bear/grizzly bear hybrid killed a few months ago. Maybe that's what will happen to the poor polar bears, they will mate with grizzlies and survive that way.
Lately it seems like this blog is turning into a "global warming" (I type "warning" at first, what a Freudian slip) blog. That's not my intent. It's just what I've been seeing. I've put some stuff on my other blog too, about mass animal extinction.
Source. Global warming over the coming century could mean a return of temperatures last seen in the age of the dinosaur and lead to the extinction of up to half of all species....Not only will carbon dioxide levels be at the highest levels for 24 million years, but global average temperatures will be higher than for up to 10 million years...Between 10 and 99 percent of species will be faced with atmospheric conditions that last existed before they evolved, and as a result from 10-50 percent of them could disappear....Scientific observations had already found that -- as predicted by the climate models -- 80 percent of species had already begun moving their traditional territorial ranges in response to the changing climatic conditions....Not only had the animals, birds and insects started to react, but there was evidence vegetation was also on the move.Not only would some species simply find no suitable space to live anymore, but there would be confrontations with invasive species being forced to move their territory. This would produce not just wipe-outs but species' mixtures never seen before.
Makes me think of the polar bear/grizzly bear hybrid killed a few months ago. Maybe that's what will happen to the poor polar bears, they will mate with grizzlies and survive that way.
Friday, September 08, 2006
9/11 thoughts
It's coming up on 5 years since 9/11 which in itself is incredible to me. Feels like maybe 2 years. But that's the whole 16 hour day thing, which is another whole topic.
I never understood why people remembered where they were when big events happened. When the Challenger blew up I was in Social Studies class with Miss Z and they came over the loudspeaker and announced it but that's all I remember. It wasn't a huge thing for me. It's not something that comes up much in conversation anyway.
But 9/11--oh yeah, I remember it so clearly. I wonder why? I was sitting at my desk around 9:00 and Steve Pincott, one of the engineers, came down the aisle saying that a plane hit the world trade center. I thought it was just some kind of accident. I envisioned a little plane like the ones that land at the Meriden airport. I tried to go onto some news sites and couldn't log onto any of them because they were all bogged with traffic. Eventually I broke a rule and installed AOL and logged onto THEIR news and saw the 2nd plane had hit and that it wasn't an accident. By then it was around 9:30. By 10:00 all work had stopped. They had set up a TV in the breakroom and everyone was in there watching TV. We saw the towers fall. I remember seeing my boss, a big huge guy (I think he was something like 6'6") crying. And it didn't matter because everyone was crying. I was doing math in my head--how many people just died while I watched on TV? How many fit in that tower? I thought at least a 100,000--the actual death toll later of only a few thousand still seems wrong to me. Not that it affected their families any less.
That night my husband had friends over and I watched CNN. I watched that 2nd plane hit over and over. I watched burning people leaping out of buildings to their death. I hated every second of it but I couldn't turn it off.
I have been a cnn.com addict every since. I think just about every day I've gone there for at least a few minutes. Funny isn't it? I never went to that site before.
In a certain way, Hurricane Katrina had a similar effect on me. It was so wrong to see dead bodies lying out in the open, rotting, in a major US city. A city I had been to twice. To watch people trapped on their rooftops by fire AND flood, dying, because there was no one to help them.
This world has gone horribly wrong. I don't see anymore how it can be turned around, how anything can ever be okay again.
I've gone twice to see "An Inconvenient Truth" and it's just depressing. We're on such a downward spiral. We really do need to go extinct. But it won't happen. No matter what Mother Nature throws at us in one place we just breed more in another place.
I never understood why people remembered where they were when big events happened. When the Challenger blew up I was in Social Studies class with Miss Z and they came over the loudspeaker and announced it but that's all I remember. It wasn't a huge thing for me. It's not something that comes up much in conversation anyway.
But 9/11--oh yeah, I remember it so clearly. I wonder why? I was sitting at my desk around 9:00 and Steve Pincott, one of the engineers, came down the aisle saying that a plane hit the world trade center. I thought it was just some kind of accident. I envisioned a little plane like the ones that land at the Meriden airport. I tried to go onto some news sites and couldn't log onto any of them because they were all bogged with traffic. Eventually I broke a rule and installed AOL and logged onto THEIR news and saw the 2nd plane had hit and that it wasn't an accident. By then it was around 9:30. By 10:00 all work had stopped. They had set up a TV in the breakroom and everyone was in there watching TV. We saw the towers fall. I remember seeing my boss, a big huge guy (I think he was something like 6'6") crying. And it didn't matter because everyone was crying. I was doing math in my head--how many people just died while I watched on TV? How many fit in that tower? I thought at least a 100,000--the actual death toll later of only a few thousand still seems wrong to me. Not that it affected their families any less.
That night my husband had friends over and I watched CNN. I watched that 2nd plane hit over and over. I watched burning people leaping out of buildings to their death. I hated every second of it but I couldn't turn it off.
I have been a cnn.com addict every since. I think just about every day I've gone there for at least a few minutes. Funny isn't it? I never went to that site before.
In a certain way, Hurricane Katrina had a similar effect on me. It was so wrong to see dead bodies lying out in the open, rotting, in a major US city. A city I had been to twice. To watch people trapped on their rooftops by fire AND flood, dying, because there was no one to help them.
This world has gone horribly wrong. I don't see anymore how it can be turned around, how anything can ever be okay again.
I've gone twice to see "An Inconvenient Truth" and it's just depressing. We're on such a downward spiral. We really do need to go extinct. But it won't happen. No matter what Mother Nature throws at us in one place we just breed more in another place.
Dream
12.19.13.11.4 9 Kan 17 Mol
This morning I had a strange dream where I went back to high school for some kind of show--they used to have a student talent show there called Razzle Dazzle but that wasn't it. For some reason I was using a walker but I didn't feel infirm or in pain. I was late to the show so I missed half of it. But supposedly the "grand finale" was going to be the best part anyway, although I didn't know what it was. I paid my $5 to get in and laboriously made my way down the aisle. I wasn't given a program and had to search one out. Once I got it, I was appalled and outraged. The whole rest of the program was preaching, gospel singing, Bible reading, Gospel reading (I remember wondering what the hell the difference was even in the dream) and then for the grand finale it just said "wait for it....wait for it..."
I dragged myself back up the aisle to the man who had just taken my $5 and asked for my money back. He refused to refund me because I had gone inside. I explained that it was for only a couple of minutes, it was between "acts" (thankfully) and how hard could it be for him to forget me when I had a walker? I waved the program in his face and said if I had been given one OUTSIDE as I should have been I wouldn't have had to go inside at all, I would have left immediately. I cited the whole "separation of church and state thing" and probably ranted a good bit. An older woman going in started talking about how Catholism wasn't part of Christianity which is ridiculous. I explained that there's Catholics which are one sect and then the Protestants which are many different sects but all of them are Christians and really I didn't care because I didn't want to be preached at or sing gospels at a PUBLIC SCHOOL but they just couldn't understand. A woman I had known in HS came up to me and said something about changing the channel or hitting the "next" button. I was exasperated by this. "It's not a radio--it's LIVE ACTS. In fact I don't even listen to radio because I hate commercials. I listen to Launchcast and if a song offends me I can block it forever or if I'm not in the mood I can just skip it. I'm skipping this and I want my money back."
But I couldn't get my money back.
When I woke up I thought about what a geek I am to dream about separation of church and state.
This morning I had a strange dream where I went back to high school for some kind of show--they used to have a student talent show there called Razzle Dazzle but that wasn't it. For some reason I was using a walker but I didn't feel infirm or in pain. I was late to the show so I missed half of it. But supposedly the "grand finale" was going to be the best part anyway, although I didn't know what it was. I paid my $5 to get in and laboriously made my way down the aisle. I wasn't given a program and had to search one out. Once I got it, I was appalled and outraged. The whole rest of the program was preaching, gospel singing, Bible reading, Gospel reading (I remember wondering what the hell the difference was even in the dream) and then for the grand finale it just said "wait for it....wait for it..."
I dragged myself back up the aisle to the man who had just taken my $5 and asked for my money back. He refused to refund me because I had gone inside. I explained that it was for only a couple of minutes, it was between "acts" (thankfully) and how hard could it be for him to forget me when I had a walker? I waved the program in his face and said if I had been given one OUTSIDE as I should have been I wouldn't have had to go inside at all, I would have left immediately. I cited the whole "separation of church and state thing" and probably ranted a good bit. An older woman going in started talking about how Catholism wasn't part of Christianity which is ridiculous. I explained that there's Catholics which are one sect and then the Protestants which are many different sects but all of them are Christians and really I didn't care because I didn't want to be preached at or sing gospels at a PUBLIC SCHOOL but they just couldn't understand. A woman I had known in HS came up to me and said something about changing the channel or hitting the "next" button. I was exasperated by this. "It's not a radio--it's LIVE ACTS. In fact I don't even listen to radio because I hate commercials. I listen to Launchcast and if a song offends me I can block it forever or if I'm not in the mood I can just skip it. I'm skipping this and I want my money back."
But I couldn't get my money back.
When I woke up I thought about what a geek I am to dream about separation of church and state.
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Voluntary Human Extinction
12.19.13.10.18 3 Etznab 11 Mol
I am all for this. I made this choice before I knew such a movement existed.
A quote from the page:
I will list some other choice quotes from the VHEMT site. A lot of this site is very clever and funny:
Ecological footprint quiz--I take up 14 acres, most take up 24, there's 4 available per person on Earth. Nice.
World Population clock w/ births & deaths
World Population (US Census) monthly
I am all for this. I made this choice before I knew such a movement existed.
A quote from the page:
As VHEMT Volunteers know, the hopeful alternative to the extinction of millions of species of plants and animals is the voluntary extinction of one species: Homo sapiens... us.
Each time another one of us decides to not add another one of us to the burgeoning billions already squatting on this ravaged planet, another ray of hope shines through the gloom.
You might also be interested in the post I just made (on my other blog) on the mass planetary extinction going on. The link that led me to the list of going--going--gone species came from the same person that gave me this link about human extinction.I will list some other choice quotes from the VHEMT site. A lot of this site is very clever and funny:
- Children's welfare will improve as there are fewer of them to care for. Considering the future world we are creating for future generations, procreation today is like renting rooms in a burning building -- renting them to our children no less.
- Humans, like all creatures, have urges which lead to reproduction. Our biological urge is to have sex, not to make babies. Our "instinct to breed" is the same as a squirrel's instinct to plant trees: the urge is to store food, trees are a natural result. If sex is an urge to procreate, then hunger's an urge to defecate.
- Consider (the) rights of (the) unconceived to stay that way.
- Consider ethics of sentencing an innocent person to life, and death, in ecological collapse.
- We pull strands from the web of life, jump up and down on it, and expect it to hold our ever-increasing weight. Few notice there's no safety net.
- Regardless of how many progeny we have or haven't produced, rather than stop at two, we must stop at once.
- Today's extinction rate is nearly one thousand times the average for the eons, and virtually every species' demise stems from the activities of one species. Guess who. Our voluntary extinction for the eternal good of all other life on Earth will be the ultimate demonstration of the best qualities of humanity: compassion and reason.
- (P)eople who aren't created won't starve
Ecological footprint quiz--I take up 14 acres, most take up 24, there's 4 available per person on Earth. Nice.
World Population clock w/ births & deaths
World Population (US Census) monthly
Friday, September 01, 2006
weird dream
12.19.13.10.17 2 Caban 10 Mol
I just had a weird dream. I only remember a bit of it. I was back in high school but physically the size I was as a college freshman. We were all in gym class. For some reason the gym floor was covered with ice. There was a pavilion set up, anchored to the ice, and we were playing basketball inside of it. Well, the boys were--the girls were outside waiting their turn. It was while I was waiting that I noticed that the floor was ice. Then all of a sudden the gym teacher said we had to leave, we were being evacuated. I had a gym bag with me like I carry now to the pool, and I was hurrying in line carrying it and my purse. I finally stopped to shove the purse into the bag and got separated from some of my friends. I ended up huddling in this little alcove on the outside of the building--kind of like a bus stop area. No wall in front, just on the sides. Some other girls came in and they had the most extraordinary facial piercings I'd ever seen (and when I was in high school, it was a big deal to have 2 holes in each ear--the really daring and crazy had 3). This one girl had so many barbell through her face she looked like a porcupine. The barbells were one-sided (like lower lip ones) and instead of having a single stainless steel ball they each had lots of blue and purple beads. She probably had....30? 50? A lot. She was upset at the evacuation and also talking about her piercings, saying how much antiseptic got used before they pierced her face. Another girl came in and she had similar beaded piercings in her ears...but in her EAR CANAL sticking out like q-tips. Some of the wires she had bent at right angles so she had beaded wires coming straight out, and pointing up and down and forward and back. I thought it was ugly AND that if someone slapped the side of her head, the wires would burst her eardrums and break into her brain and kill her.
The girl with the facial piercings started to take hers out and move them around. They weren't real piercings, just jewelry wire with very sharp ends. Her face was bleeding and it was obvious she was going to have scars.
Then someone said that the security guard assigned to our area was coming to kill us, that he was going to go inside the building and shoot us through the brick wall, and everyone started to panic, even though no gun can shoot through a brick wall (not anything carried regularly anyway) and that's when I had to get up.
I just had a weird dream. I only remember a bit of it. I was back in high school but physically the size I was as a college freshman. We were all in gym class. For some reason the gym floor was covered with ice. There was a pavilion set up, anchored to the ice, and we were playing basketball inside of it. Well, the boys were--the girls were outside waiting their turn. It was while I was waiting that I noticed that the floor was ice. Then all of a sudden the gym teacher said we had to leave, we were being evacuated. I had a gym bag with me like I carry now to the pool, and I was hurrying in line carrying it and my purse. I finally stopped to shove the purse into the bag and got separated from some of my friends. I ended up huddling in this little alcove on the outside of the building--kind of like a bus stop area. No wall in front, just on the sides. Some other girls came in and they had the most extraordinary facial piercings I'd ever seen (and when I was in high school, it was a big deal to have 2 holes in each ear--the really daring and crazy had 3). This one girl had so many barbell through her face she looked like a porcupine. The barbells were one-sided (like lower lip ones) and instead of having a single stainless steel ball they each had lots of blue and purple beads. She probably had....30? 50? A lot. She was upset at the evacuation and also talking about her piercings, saying how much antiseptic got used before they pierced her face. Another girl came in and she had similar beaded piercings in her ears...but in her EAR CANAL sticking out like q-tips. Some of the wires she had bent at right angles so she had beaded wires coming straight out, and pointing up and down and forward and back. I thought it was ugly AND that if someone slapped the side of her head, the wires would burst her eardrums and break into her brain and kill her.
The girl with the facial piercings started to take hers out and move them around. They weren't real piercings, just jewelry wire with very sharp ends. Her face was bleeding and it was obvious she was going to have scars.
Then someone said that the security guard assigned to our area was coming to kill us, that he was going to go inside the building and shoot us through the brick wall, and everyone started to panic, even though no gun can shoot through a brick wall (not anything carried regularly anyway) and that's when I had to get up.
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