Wednesday, November 22, 2006

things seem to be going badly

Lately it seems like I keep getting whacked with the friendship stick. Have you ever been whacked with that stick? It goes like this.
A friend comes up to you and tells you how much s/he adores you, more than anyone in the world, and how s/he truly understands you and "gets" you.
This makes you feel good. Special. Loved.
Then comes the stick: "Because I love you so much, I am going to tell you the truth about you..." which is followed by a recitation of just how horrible a person you are, your selfishness, your greed, your apathy, your voice, your looks, your mode of dress, your cheap shoes, your bad haircut, your lack of education and poise....etc.
Yes, once in a while someone does appear to just like me without telling me I suck. But when someone tells you that YOU suck, it's really the opposite. They are trying to suck the joy out of you.
I don't feel like there's a lot of joy in my life right now. I have to struggle to find it and when I do, I can't keep my focus on it.
12.19.13.14.19 6 Cauac 12 Cen

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