Thursday, June 30, 2005

Jaguar Nights-my book on the Tzolkin

The printer gave me a good price of $2 per copy to get Jaguar Nights printed, which is good news, but the bad news is I have to buy 5,000 copies, or spend $10,000 for the print run. I think that's too many copies, and I don't have $10 grand, so I am going to keep looking for a traditional publisher.
I was supposed to have an agent but he's not answering my emails. I guess I'm back on my own.

Happy 3 Muluc

12.19.12.7.9 3 Muluc 7 Tzec

It's the end of June already, can you believe it? Time is really changing, isn't it?

Muluc-water. Totally appropriate, as it's still raining from yesterday's storm. It's been raining on and off since Monday (when my car got flooded--but that's another whole story, not for here).

Water is usually a good thing. Water can teach us a lot. We absolutely need water to live, but then again we can be poisoned by water and die. (Everything has a toxic level. Everything.) Recently some runners got sick (I think some even died) because during crazed exertion they drank only water, not sports drinks with electrolytes, and their electrolyte balance dropped. Bad. My poor cactuses got flooded yesterday. Bad. My new plants got a great big drink down to their roots. Good. See, it's all subjective.

That's how the Maya and Aztecs and other meso-American people had so many gods. In reality, they were all just faces of each other. Water can bless or drown. In war, the war god blesses one side and turns his face from the other side. There's four faces right there. Chalchiutlicue rules over a different type of water than Tlaloc. And the Maya call Tlaloc Chac Mol. (And off the shore of Cozumel, if you snorkel there, there are sunken Chac Mol statues about 30-40' out--how cool is that??)

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

rain gods are visiting

What a beautiful thunderstorm we had today! At around 2:15 it started to get dark and really pour down rain. Lightning struck so close to where I work that car alarms were going off! Shortly after that came the sirens...funny how they are so entwined in my mind from years of summer storms with massive lightning and thunder followed by fire trucks taking off.

I had to take my husband's car into the shop and I was standing outside waiting for a ride home and just feeling so very PAGAN. How can anyone be outside looking at that dark grey sky as lightning forks down all over and thunder rumbles the very building you're leaning against, and not understand why the ancients worshipped gods in the storm? The rain was coming down so hard it was pouring off the roof, and the gutter downspouts were gushing several feet straight out into the parking lot, and still unable to handle all the rain. I greeted Tlaloc and his tlaloques, and Chac Mol, and even Thor.

I love that kind of warm summer rain
. I could stand outside in it all day. I would have gone swimming but for the lightning (and lack of a car to get there). I never feel more pagan than when I am calling the lightning. And call it I did. It was coming down all around the building where I waited! And as I got a ride home, it hit the United Concrete building just when we drove by. It's all energy, it's all good.

When I got home, my sacred cactus dish garden was totally flooded. It was right below the corner of the porch roof and water was pouring directly into the pot. I managed to pour most of the water out, but the pot is too big and heavy for me to lift so I just pushed it away. My husband tried to lift it to move it onto the porch and the pot broke. Oops. Guess I have to get a new pot. The cactus is in no danger, but it can't be moved again. And it lives in the house during the winter so we have to be able to move it.

Happy 2 Lamat

12.19.12.7.8 2 Lamat 6 Tzec

Today's my Haab birthday-6 Tzec. I never paid attention to it before or celebrated it. My "real" birthday is in 9 days and my Tzolkin birthday's also coming up. 3 birthdays in one month, aren't I lucky?

Lamat--star, rabbit, divination. I recently posted the rabbit-in-the-moon lamat picture. I've been back into the I-ching lately and I really want to find a way to blend it with my shamanic work. My friend Berhard of www.sipp.org has tried it, but his way doesn't match up that good for me. I want to do it differently. My friend Ladyhawke and I are going to write a book on it. So that's my divination stuff for today. I've also been looking at the spiral structure of western (sun-sign) astrology lately.

Low number day, good day to start.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

litany of woes

Last night I was down in West Haven and it started to rain. I was driving my husband's car and my car was in the driveway with the windows open. I called home and asked my husband to close the windows for me. This morning, my car was flooded. But he had nicely put a trash bag and towel over my seat.
I overslept this morning so I'm feeling very rushed in everthing.
Last night my husband came upstairs around 10:30 and asked if I'd seen our white cat. I hadn't. We searched the house, opened a can of food, called him. He was no where in the house. But there's a hole in the accordian-thingy on the air conditioner and he maybe could have squeezed through that...but he has agoraphobia, he's terrified of going outside. My husband said he did hear a ruckus and a thud from the living room. Maybe the cats were wrestling on top of the love seat and Nutter fell through the hole? I don't know. But my little white kitty was gone! My husband got dressed and went tramping outside, looking under the porches since that's where he goes when he's outside, and guess where he was? In the excavated part of the circle, wet and muddy, cowering in terror. He wouldn't let me wash him so I just wiped him with a rag.
This morning when I got up, the other large cory was dead. He'd been mopey and his tail was bitten off. Damn those mean bettas. I haven't decided if I'm going to replace him. I fed him to the sacred cactus.
And I think I'm getting pink-eye. Yesterday my eyes were so dry that when I blinked they crackled (and I drank a lot of water yesterday) and today they just feel weird.

Happy 1 Manik

12.19.12.7.7 1 Manik 5 Tzec

Manik- being a tool, a human angel. This is the lowest, initiating energy. So if you feel that you are a human angel, or you want to commit to that, today's a good day for that type of personal dedication. See the link for lots o' good info on human angels.

Monday, June 27, 2005

I won a prize!

I got a judge's choice award in a photoshop contest on Worth1000.com for my Feather Flower picture, made with feathers from my bobo parrots (I call them that-their names are Goober--Goobo--and Zeebo; they are brother and sister from different clutches, 1/2 rainbow lorikeet and 1/2 red lory.)

I did terrible in the contest itself but at least I didn't come in last; and then I got this email from a judge saying he'd given me a gold star. Yay.

Happy 13 Cimi

12.19.12.7.6 13 Cimi 4 Tzec

Cimi is the ooh-scary death's-head skull. Oh no, I don't want to die!
Dreamspell calls it "the transformer" in a effort to disguise the concept of death. That's because we live in a society that's terrified of change and dying. We have no problem eating, even though something has to die so we can eat (to all you holier-than-thou vegans: your salad is alive and screaming while you eat it!). We just don't like to think about it, some poor cow or pig or chicken being slaughtered. We hate death. Since today is 13 Cimi, the highest Cimi number, it's a good day to think about death and talk about it.
The type of nurses I admire most are cancer nurses and hospice nurses. Most of the people they work with are going to die under their care, and yet these people are cheerful and loving as they do their work. I couldn't do it. I don't mean the gross parts of being a nurse--I mean seeing people I've become attached to slip away. I cry when characters I like die in books and movies! Nothing is sadder than poor little Frodo's face when he sees Gandalf fall into that void and he knows it's his fault because he wanted to come that way. (Even though I read the books and I know Gandalf doesn't die.)
I am not suggesting you go out and kill someone or something. But you might want to take a walk through a cemetary and have a nice visit with the dead, even if they aren't your own ancestors. Visit your pool of souls and throw in some flowers. Do a Dias de los Muertos ritual even though it's not November 1.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Happy 12 Chicchan

12.19.12.7.5 12 Chicchan 3 Tzec

Chicchan is kundalini energy, serpent energy (Hello Kukulkan/Queztalcoatl!). I would even go so far as to say dragon energy, except that the dreamspell people assign dragons to Imix (which in my mind is illogical). Yesterday we talked about the seed blueprint of creation changing the energies of this world, well that includes the Chicchan kundalini energy. If the seed blueprint changes so that people who are aligned to it are channeling a higher frequency energy, then more people will be spontaneouly awakening their kundalini.

Chicchan is also 1st and 2nd chakra energy, creation/sexual energy. In 40 days we'll be at the ultimate highest Chicchan, but for now you'll have to make due with penultimate energy (isn't that a great word?).

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Happy 11 Kan

12.19.12.7.4 11 Kan 2 Tzec

Kan is the Muse and inspiration. The yellow of it represents corn, or seeds. And yet another ephipany--the seed blue print of creation! I have a Shamballa student (Shamballa Multi-Dimensional Healing is the form of Reiki I teach most) and she is very dedicated to learning & growing, and recently she said that for no reason at all, the energy that she channels has been changing in intensity, and she asked me about gates and such. Well, we have recently had gates and energy changes, but what's really going on in her is that the seed blue print of creation has changed, and because I aligned her to that in level 2, she changes with it.

Friday, June 24, 2005

Happy 10 Akbal

12.19.12.7.3 10 Akbal 1 Tzec

Akbal--darkness, secrets, place of transformation. Think of Akbal as the coccoon the caterpillar goes into to transform into a beautiful butterfly. If you feel the urge to withdraw and contemplate your navel today, go for it. (or float in a pool and do a breathing meditiation!) You might feel like the pressures on you are unbearable--and just think, we're only at TEN. The universe can (and will) crank it up three more notches!

I'm excited because in 20 days is 4 Akbal, my Tzolkin birthday, and in 14 days is my actual birthday. I think that's the closest they come together again in my lifetime. Though it's not 4 Akbal 6 Tzec coming (that's when I'm 52, and it will be at the end of June that year, still about 3 weeks different from my human birthday--I mean, Julian birthday).

dream (10 akbal)

For some reason, I was taking classes in Conversational French, which I have no interest in. But I screwed up and thought the classes started at the time they ended, so I missed the first one. My husband was taking classes at the same school, so since I was there & had missed my class I went to his with him. It was some kind of really advanced mathematics (he's a math minor). There were no numbers involved. It was like "a circle plus a car equals a tree" and then the teacher would explain why a circle added to a car did not equal a house, for instance. And it wasn't numerology. So you can imagine how bored I was, even in the dream.
Somehow I hooked up with my sister in law and we were going to some gathering. Maybe a drumming circle? Something pagan or new agey. For whatever reason, we went to my friend Beth's house. Beth in real life lives in Rhode Island; the house where she lived with her mother is not far from where we went in the dream, but in the dream the house was much larger and it was her father's house. Even though in the dream as in real life I hadn't seen Beth for several years, Susie and I walked right into the house and started calling for her. We found her upstairs. I think she had one of her kids with her. She was a little confused to find us there, (especially since she doesn't know Susie) but she said sometimes she commuted to work from her dad's place because it was closer to where she worked (it isn't, unless she works somewhere else now). We explained about the gathering and she said as soon as her father came home we could go. Her dad came home and we went, but we couldn't find it after all.
Hmm, twice in one dream, just missing what I was trying to get to. Going to the class at the wrong time and not being able to find the gathering.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

(picture) my other cat


Zen-Zen, el gato negro. He is half seal-point Siamese and half black cat. He' s usually not so sleepy looking, but my digital camera has dual flash, and it gives the cats a chance to blink in that milisecond. He's not as fat as he looks-he's got a lot of loose flesh. He was the runt of the litter but his skin was the size of a normal kitten. I thought he'd grow into it, but as his underlying muscles and body grew, so did his skin. He is very loveable, purrs all the time, sleep s on my pillow at night. Is sleeping on my arm purring right now.Posted by Hello

(picture) one of my cats


Nutter, el gato blanco. He's a Turkish Persian. Or Turkish Angora, I forget which. He doesn't have the big plumey tail though. Posted by Hello

(picture) cactus flowers


The flower I mentioned below as being one is actually two...or another one grew since last night. That seems more likely, as there are 3 more buds (where the 2 red arrows point).
Just occurred to me that a few weeks ago my other cactus bloomed too--and I've never had a cactus bloom for me, ever, before.Posted by Hello

(picture) diggin' up the Circle


My husband digging up the Circle last Friday. Gives you a good idea of its size/scale. Posted by Hello

cactus flower

Last night I was walking by my cactus garden and I saw a big yellow blob which I thought was a piece of garbage and it's a FLOWER. It's one of the extremely hardy cactus I got from Bert. It's not even buried or anything, it's a cut piece lying on the ground. (When you do that, the spines magically turn into roots--I didn't believe it until I saw it with the ones I got from Miss Beth.) I was so stupidly excited. I feel like it's a message--but from who? About what?
I wonder what day it grew? Tuesday was 7 Ahau/Xochitl (Flower). ....hmm...
I will post a picture later.

Happy 9 Ik (portal) and the seating of Tzec

12.19.12.7.2 9 Ik 0 Tzec

It's the day Tzec takes the throne...It's the month I was born (6 Tzec). There just isn't much on the meanings of the Haab. I can't even tell you what Tzec means.

It's the 3d incoming portal day of this Tzolkin. Since it's an Ik day (communication, breath of divine, sacred tree, grounding) expect anything that comes to you to be related to Ik-ness. (which is not at all like ickiness).

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

(picture) Rabbit in the Moon


Since tonight's the full Moon (mead moon, honey moon) I thought I'd post an outline showing the rabbit which the Aztecs saw where we see a man in the moon. My friend sees a dragon, but since I found the rabbit that's what I always notice first. Enjoy! Posted by Hello

Circle rebuilding update

Haven't posted anything because we haven't worked on it since Friday. Hoping to do some stuff tonight. After Monday's ritual they gave us all the crystals which had been used, to bury there. I am going to put my portrait of Quetzalcoatl/Kukulkan in there too.

Happy 8 Imix & Full moon!

12.19.12.7.1 8 Imix 19 Zotz

We've passed the first 20 days of this Tzolkin. Because I'm doing this on-line daykeeping stuff, I am hyper-aware of what's going on in each day's energies. People who are not aware keep asking me "have you felt anything funny lately?" Well, yes. We had a major gate open on 05/05/05 and we had a new Tzolkin cycle start 20 days ago. Now we're into a new season since the Solstice was yesterday. People look at Mercury to see if it's retrograde (and do they even know what that means?) It's not just Mercury that affects us!

We're back to Imix, but ramped up. It's the "eight" day of Imix, the perfect day to honor your Mother (earth mother and mommy-mother) and those who nurture you.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Happy 7 Ahau, portal day & summer solstice

12.19.12.7.0 7 Ahau 18 Zotz

Happy birthday to Mixtli (Dark Cloud), narrator of Aztec (which I just finished re-reading) and to my "niece" 7-Flower Kailey Morgan, who is celebrating her first Tzolkin round today.
Also it's the Summer Solstice--longest day of the year, first day of summer.
And a portal, reaping portal #2 of this Tzolkin.
What a busy day, huh?
Flower is of course the highest and best, the solar mind, the pinnacle of existance.
7 is perfect balance and magick. (I tell ya, my little Flower is going to be famous someday--she's also got an astrological chart full of grand trines.)

Monday, June 20, 2005

happy 6 Cauac

12.19.12.6.19 6 Cauac 17 Zotz

I forgot to say "Happy Father's Day" yesterday, so here's a belated one.

Today's a Cauac day--rain/storm. Doesn't mean it will rain (don't be so literal!). I always look at what rain and storms REPRESENT-energy moving and things falling from the sky. Put those together and you have energy falling from the sky. Energy is neutral, so what are you going to do with it? Write a book, paint a picture, plant a flower?

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Happy 5 Etznab

12.19.12.6.18 5 Etznab 16 Zotz

Etznab the flint knife, the sacrifice, the day of reckonening, and what the Dreamspell people call the Hall of Mirrors.

Sacrifice is something most people don't like to talk about or think about. This is due to the unfortunate circumstances of the ancient Mesoamericans having sacrified PEOPLE--when you're talking about Mayan and Aztec stuff, and sacrifice comes up, everyone gets uneasy. But sacrifice doesn't have to be like that. What if you just took 1/4 of the food on your plate, and gave it to an animal to eat, to honor that animal? Is that a sacrifice? Of course (as long as you don't go and refill your plate at the buffet). I think I have written enough about itza in this blog to know that giving of yourself doesn't have to mean pain or disfigurement or death.

Giving something up opens a space in your life. Yesterday with Caban, we burned incense to feed the gods, and for them to feel kindly disposed toward our prayer. Today we back that up by sacrificing, which opens up the room for whatever it is we prayed for. Want a new wardrobe? Throw out your old clothes. Tired of being alone and you want a full-time lover? Empty 1/2 of your closet and bureau and vanity so there's room for his stuff.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Happy 4 Caban

12.19.12.6.17 4 Caban 15 Zotz

Anniversary of the end of this world --although the 12/21/12 date is actually 4 Ahau, the Aztecs believed it would be 4 Caban. At any rate, it's going to be earthquakes this time around. You know, kind of like the four they had in California this week.

Caban is also incense, and I did light quite a bit of it today. Sending the energy of change up to the gods, along with some yummy food (Nag Champa, in this case--I don't like burning copal in the house, too much smoke).

Friday, June 17, 2005

(picture) Circle 06-17-05


Here's how it looks right now. This is two pictures blended so that's why it's shaded funny. There are 80 edging stones--I just went with my dad and bought 30 more. They are placed temporarily just to make sure we have enough (which you can clearly see we don't--I think we need about ten more). It's hard to see, but behind the stick where there is a darker part of the circle, my husband dug down about 8" and removed all the tree and grass roots. Inside that hole (which will eventually fill the entire inner ring) we will put the weed barrier and the drainage rocks and then the sand. Posted by Hello

(picture) closeup of Circle


This is a ground-view of how we outlined the new Circle with pink paint. We centered a stick and tied a rope around it with a large nail (a nine inch nail, as a matter of fact) on the end, and dragged the nail through the dirt, and then painted the drag mark hot pink. (I don't like orange and I didn't think green would show up, so I got pink.) You can see the centered stick nicely in this shot.Posted by Hello

(picture) Circle 06-16-05


Circle 06-16-05, as it looked from the same window I took the September 04 picture.
We have removed all the sand (the light parts are sand which sifted through the weed barrier) and the weed barrier, and outlined the new dual-edged Circle with hot pink paint.
Can you believe I got CARDED at Home Depot buying the paint on Sunday? The woman, who was approximately 110 years old herself, asked me if I was 21. I told her how old I am. She just looked at me and demanded to see proof. Now I know I don't look my age, but I don't look that young either. Sheesh.
Anyway, the new Circle will have a double edging of curved stones. In between them will be a mound of cedar chips. In the cedar chips will be 20 concrete pillars with the Mayan daysigns inscribed on them with Garden Poetry tiles. The Tree will be in the outer ring of stone. In the center will be beach sand.
We are digging out the center and removing all the tree roots and grass roots. We are putting down better weed barrier (professional grade) and then a layer of stones for drainage, and then the sand.Posted by Hello

(picture) Cactus Garden v1


This is my cactus garden as it looked today, about an hour ago. The cactus are from my best friend's yard, Bert's yard (Tlakaelel's friend) and Dennis Alexander's Circle in Florida. When we are finished with our Circle, the extra rocks are going into the new cactus/rock garden.Posted by Hello

circle rebuilding

Yesterday I bought 50 curved edging stones for the new Circle 50 stones x 9# each = 450# and I lifted them into the cart, then into the car, and helped unload them at home. That's at least 1,000# of material moved. No wonder I hurt today!
This afternoon me and dad are going back to HD to get 30 more curved stones. Not that he helps much, but he feels useful. Would have been nice to have had someone with me last night! Except then I don't think I could have taken 50, as it was my Pathfinder was totally sluggish. Couldn't put 200# more of person in there too.
It's cool out again today (67 degrees F as I write) so we should be able to do more work this afternoon. I have some pictures, will post later. My friend Chule Balam suggested I do some video too.
I had an epiphany about how to do the day-sign columns on the way to work this morning. I'm going to talk to my husband and see if my idea will work.
When we dug out the Tree of Life, the base had all rotted from dampness. So much for pressure-treated wood. It was left over from the front porch; maybe I should treat the front porch with some kind of sealant, huh?

Happy 3 Cib

12.19.12.6.16 3 Cib 14 Zotz

Yay vulture day! More cleansing. Get it out of me! Make me clean!
On the Huna Yahoo group I'm part of, we are talking about cutting karmic ties (aka cords)--Eb being the web of ties binding us. Cib is the scissors to cut them with. It's all good.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Happy 2 Men

12.19.12.6.15 2 Men 13 Zotz

Men is wisdom & knowledge, but not always applied. It's just kind of there, like old washing machines in the shed--you never know when someone will need some parts. Hmm, it just occurred to me that if Eb is karma then Men must be the akashic records.

This is what happens when you spend time every day thinking about the daysigns and living in the energy. Things just come to you.

2 of course, is low energy. Amazing that I had any kind of breakthrough!

I will be taking pictures of the naked circle when I get home from work and posting them tonight with more circle-making info.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

(picture) World Tree


This World Tree picture come from exploratorium.edu.
Our Tree is not decorated like this (although Dennis' was). Ours is carved with every Reiki symbol I know, along both arms & the upright, front and back.

Posted by Hello

(picture) Circle, v2


The Circle, last year. You can see the Tree to the right, with the 19" dreamcatcher I made special for the Circle hanging from it, and on its base offerings and protective figures. The tile in the center has a direction star on it (had to have it!) properly aligned. The whole thing is outlined with simple folding fencing #1 to keep my dad from trying to mow in there (the Alzheimer's thing) and #2 to keep people from crossing into it anywhere but the entrance.
Dennis Alexander had his entrance to the South (basically, the corner of the garage) but that didn't work well for us, so we moved it to the North. The Tree is not quite in the West.
Posted by Hello

new series: How to Build a Circle (#1)

Well, our Circle is asleep again. We took out the sand today (had to sieve out the maple spinners and chunks of cedar which had gotten mixed in) and took up the weed barrier. Starting tomorrow, I am going to post pictures as the Circle comes back to life, which can serve as instructions for those who would like to build their own.

Our original Circle was inspired by the one Dennis Alexander had at his old place on Treasure Island in Florida, where he lived right on the beach (nice, huh?). He had cleared a circle of vegation, and it was just plain beach sand. All around it (it was maybe 20' across) he had cactus and statues and all kinds of cool stuff. In the west was the Sacred Tree--his looked more like a cross than ours does; his was based on the Tree of Life from Palenque (I think that's where it's from, see image, above). It was painted white and covered with mirrors. Some of the cactus in my cactus garden came from Dennis' Circle.

When we came home from Florida, we went to work on our own Circle. I wanted to build it in the only clear spot left in the yard (the other spot next to the garage was taken up by the Maypole), but the two large trees in my yard were very insistant that they be part of it. So I made the Circle between those trees; it was maybe 11-12' across. I outlined it with 20 garden poetry stones with the 20 daysigns in Mayan, and on Good Friday (hahaha) 2003 my husband built our Tree of Life (a T cross)--our neighbors looked mildly interested to see us building a cross in the back yard on Good Friday. That was it; a very simple Circle. I don't think I have any pictures of it. It had grass in the middle and kind of blended into the yard (except for the Tree of Life, of course).

Last year, 2004, a friend who I met through Dennis Alexander came up to stay with me (the same one who was here last month), and she had some ideas for improving the Circle, which she helped me start implementing. We white-washed the Tree (mixed white paint, a dash of blue paint, and water) and pulled up all the grass, and moved the daysign stones out so that the trees weren't merely part of the border, they were actually inside the Circle. The energy changed dramatically.

So my husband & I put down weed barrier, and bought a dozen bags of woodchips, and outlined the circle with a border of cedar chips about 6" thick. Inside that we put about a yard and a half of beach sand. ("Play sand" they call it, if you want to buy some. Call a garden/landscaping center or gravel pit and buy it in bulk, should be $30-40 a yard, which will fill the bed of a pick-up truck.) To read about my adventures with the beach sand, read my "had a dad" blog, entries 16, 17 & 19.

It ended up looking like the picture, above, in September 2004. It looked like that until this weekend; I'll post shortly pictures of what it looks like now, stripped naked (again) and spray-painted pink. Sounds ghastly, I know.

It took me SO LONG to put down all that weed barrier last year--TWO ROLLS--and it's all garbage now. We didn't have the sand deep enough and when we raked, the rake tines chewed it all up. Well, live and learn, right? And all those lawn staples my husband is going to have to pull up when he digs it out properly.

Happy 1 Ix

12.19.12.6.14 1 Ix 12 Zotz

The first small wheel (13) of this Tzolkin has passed, and with it my little fishie Melchizedek aka Betta-Boy.

This is the first Ix day, and also the #1 Ix day. If you want to become some kind of shaman or pagan, today's a good day to start down that path. If you already are a pagan shaman, you're connected to the natural rhythms of the Earth & galaxy today. It's a better day than most to do earth-working, magick, spells, etc.

dead fishie :(

My betta died! I am so sad. He was the whole reason I had a nice big tank. He was swimming around eating last night, this morning he was dead and his color had fled. The three cory-fish don't seem to miss him at all. Then again, he liked to nibble on them.

I guess tonight I have to go fish-shopping.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Happy 13 Ben

12.19.12.6.13 13 Ben 11 Zotz

This is the first 13 of the Tzolkin, and the highest energy Ben will reach this cycle.

Ben is of course the "skywalker" (Bleagh-star wars)--the seeker of knowledge, the teacher. Seek high knowledge today!

Personally I am continuing to read that advanced astrology book.

pool of souls shrine

I haven't decided how I feel about this. Remember that I told you a few weeks ago I guy died in my Pool of Souls? His friends/family have made that section of the bridge, the very section where I stand to throw my offerings, into a shrine, with huge bouquets of flowers (like for a funeral) and a cross with his name, and all kinds of other stuff.

Okay, I do know this: the idea of standing there to throw flowers into the river now makes me feel very uncomfortable. I know I shouldn't care what others think. But I don't want my spiritual actions to be connected in any way to this person's death.

I also want to pull all the dead flowers out of the arrangements and toss them, but I don't know the etiquette for that. Who takes care of those flowers? Will the person who put them there come back and throw them away when they die? Or will they become an eyesore of death like the dead dog around the corner? (A long story).

12 eb activities

I did a colon cleanse/partial liver flush (lots of bile)--letting go! (anything you hold onto is karma)
I had therapy IN THE POOL. (Ah, bliss, to be submerged in water and be weightless for a couple of hours--then gravity hits me. Gravity sucks.) not sure how much I let go of in therapy, but it was more food for thought this week--things to think about and put into practice later.
I am going to try to follow the new FDA's 70% thing, eating 70% of my usual food. I wish I could increase my activity more. Swimming will help. I couldn't figure out why my legs and back hurt this morning--I swam for well over an hour (always moving)--painless exercise.

Monday, June 13, 2005

happy 12 Eb

12.19.12.6.12 12 Eb 10 Zotz

Are we back to Eb already? Wow, time flies. Eb is the grass and the road. To me, it' s the strands and threads of karma (aka) which bind us to each other, our pasts, and our thoughtforms.

If you haven't seen What the Bleep do We Know yet, see it. It really explains how thoughtforms and karma work, even if it never uses those terms. I just watched it again on Wednesday (3d time) and yeah, parts of it are a little hokey, but there's some good stuff in there!

12 is a high number, a day to be entangled in our karma, so entangled that we can't see the path we are on.

Sunday, June 12, 2005

sick

I picked up some kind of bug while at the hospital with my grandmother on Friday. By Friday afternoon, I felt totally exhausted and drained and my head was aching. I even got to swim in the afternoon at my therapist's house, which should have cured all my ills, but it did not.
I came home from my mom's around 9:00 and went right to bed. Yesterday I woke up feeling worse. I tried to go grocery shopping and felt so dizzy that I had to leave the store after only putting 4 things in my cart (I did manage to pay for them, barely). My heart was racing, I was having cold and hot flashes, and I honestly didn't know if I could drive myself home. I slept until dinner time. Since I hadn't purchased any food (only dayquil, nyquil, and an electric toothbrush) we went out to eat. My food came to me wrong twice and I told them to take it off the bill. How hard is it to remember "no sauce, fries well done" The first time, the sauce was there and it was slopped all over everything, ruining it. I sent it back. The next time, the fries were limp and cool. I have zero patience for stuff like that when I don't feel good. Give me what I ordered. I'm not paying $8 for food that's not prepared how I requested. We watched the Whole 10 Yards (funny, but not the greatest movie ever) and then some pretty horrible horror movie on Sci-fi channel about the Day of the Dead in Mexico. They did a good job setting up the story and then it just fell apart. I fell asleep before it was over, and woke up this morning with just a splitting headache (right across my forehead and behind my eyes) so I've taken a double dose of liquid-gel aspirin (the only kind that works for me).
So that is why I did not post the daykeeping information for a few days.

Happy 11 Chuen

12.19.12.6.11 11 Chuen 9 Zotz

11=energy is increasing to a very high level

Chuen-Monkey, artist, trickster. Pranks can backfire or cause harm where no harm was meant. Creativity is high, but may not be up to society's standards (if you care about that sort of thing).

Saturday, June 11, 2005

10 Oc 1st burner

12.19.12.6.10 10 Oc 8 Zotz

and I spent the day in bed, sick.

Friday, June 10, 2005

Grandma had a stroke, or did she?

We thought my grandmother had a stroke today. Rather than reiterate it all, please look at my other blog.

I will do the calendar posting later. I'm still kind of in shock.

9 Muluc

12.19.12.6.9 9 Muluc 7 Zotz

Thursday, June 09, 2005

more powerless-ness

Why am I being beaten over the head with this? Is this some kind of breakthrough?
My friend had been promising to take my husband & I out to dinner in exchange for us fixing her computer last month. (It was her computer sitting next to the back door which the thief did not take.) She works 2 jobs and it's hard to coordinate schedules, but after several bouts of last minute cancellations and reschedules, we were up for tonight--that is, as of yesterday afternoon when I spoke to her. This afternoon she bailed again, saying she forgot she had to pay her rent and she can't afford it. I am so frustrated. I had someone call me yesterday and want to pay me actual money to help him do some computer stuff, and I turned him down because I had this dinner thing tonight. ARGH.
I hate, hate, hate, hate depending on other people for anything. Yes, I'm a control freak. That's what this powerlessness thing is about. Not having control.

Happy 8 Lamat

12.19.12.6.8 8 Lamat 6 Zotz

It's 8 Lamat, so if you are one who celebrates the 8s of each daysign, today's the day for the Rabbit/Star.

I love the fact that the Aztecs saw a rabbit in the moon, where we see a man. Someday I will get a picture of the full moon and draw the rabbit--he's pretty easy to see once you figure it out.

I also love it that rabbits represent drunkenness. Think of how a rabbit hops erratically-over here, over there, and then randomly freezes in place. Easy to think how one would think it was drunk! I also love what I call "bunny time" which is during the blue hour, right around sunset, when all the red leaches from the air and everything looks blue, and if you go to Hammonasett beach at that time, there are rabbits everywhere. I counted ninety during one trip.

The Star is the Mayan translation, and it's the planet Venus. It also represents astrology and astronomy, and today I am reading a really good book on astrology to celebrate.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Happy 7 Manik

12.19.12.6.7 7 Manik 5 Zotz

7 is a great number, balanced energy, not to much, not too little. Refreshing after a week of sloggy low energy.

Manik is the deer and the hand of god or being a tool of the gods. Makes me think about being a human angel. That means that you say, out loud, that you are willing to be where you need to be in order to be a human angel to someone else. You may tell the person something directly, they may overhear you saying it to someone else, or it may even be hearsay ("I heard this person say..."). Maybe all you need to do is let someone get in front of you in a line at a store, or in a traffic jam. Who knows? The point is that YOU DON'T KNOW when it's happening. The other person might not even know.
The other thing that's part of it is when babies stare at you (strange babies, not your own or friend's kids). They are absorbing your energy, taking a picture of your soul to refer to later. I'm not a big fan of babies, but when I feel one connect I always smile and acknowledge what's going on.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

powerless-ness

Okay, I get it already.

I am powerless over my surroundings (but not a victim).

So how do I get past recognizing that I am powerless into whatever comes next?

What does come next?

What prompted this itrade, you might ask? My window came back. After FIVE weeks. (For those of you new to the blog, my house was broken into at the beginning of May.) As the man was carrying it into the house, I noticed that the frame was awfully dirty. Lots of black dirt. Kinda like...the fingerprint powder the cops use...funny that they'd use black powder like that when making a whole new window, isn't it?

So he installs the window and I go to look at it, pull it down...and, strangely, it comes right out of the track. Because the latch is broken. You know--the latch that the fucking criminal who broke into my house busted to break into my house.

Funny that a NEW WINDOW would have the same FINGERPRINT POWDER on it as the OLD WINDOW and also the SAME BROKEN LATCH, eh?

They didn't replace the window. Nope. They stuck some new glass in it and brought back the old, broken bad-energy window.

I cried and called my husband and called my insurance company and called the glass company and the owner of the glass company got in his truck and drove to my house and I cried some more because I have a nasty old broken-latched burglar-energy window in my living room now.

I AM FUCKING POWERLESS.

Why does this keep happening to me?

Oh, that's right, stuff happens to me that I don't like BECAUSE I AM POWERLESS.

I wish I drank. I'd drink now.

But at least I'm not eating. Nope. Not eating. That's a positive step.

happy 6 cimi

12.19.12.6.6 6 Cimi 4 Zotz

Ah, Cimi. Ch-ch-changes. (David Bowie, for those who don't like my singing.) Transformation, death, rebirth. If you don't like the situation you're in, you can do two things. Change yourself, or change the situation. Most of the time it's easier to change your reaction to it. If you think someone is a real jerk, look at what about him pushes your buttons. He's loud and inconsiderate? He swears? He drives badly? The only things about others which affect us are what we have in ourselves and fear. Other people are mirrors. We react to what we see in US, not what we see in THEM. When the jerk gets loud, modulate your own voice. When he nearly runs over the handicapped guy from the mail room screeching out of the parking lot to go for lunch, ease your own foot off the gas. Some day you'll realize that he no longer bothers you, that maybe he's still a jerk, but you don't care.
That's mastery.
Mastery is not what most think it is. They think being a master at something is doing it great. But being a master means you don't even see it. The things you have mastered in life are invisible to you. Look at the things around you that your friends and co-workers struggle with. How many of them can you say "I don't get it, it's no big deal?" to? Those are what you've mastered.
I can't think of something that doesn't bother me...because those things don't bother me! So why should I think about them?
6 is getting to be balanced energy. I've felt so sluggish ramping up this Tzolkin.
Hopefully I'll feel better over the next few days.

papaya diet

Today is week 2 of Tlakaelel's fruit fast diet. I am doing papaya. I could not find the papayas at Stop and Shop, so I bought a bottle of mandarin-papaya-mango juice. Probably not exactly what the Maestro meant, but there was no bottle or concentrate of papaya only.
Actually it's yummy juice, but it's all sugar. Is it better to drink healthy juice filled with sugar and calories or diet caffeine-free pepsi with no calories (or nutrition)?? Hmm??

Happy new moon!

Yesterday was the new moon. So now is the perfect time to work on anything you want INCREASED. Increase the amount of weight you've lost. Increase your income. Increase your happiness & joy. Increase your prosperity and abundance. Increase world peace. Increase the cleanliness of your house. You get it.

deep ones dream

Some people probably don't know what a Deep One is. I will explain.
In the 1920's a man named HP Lovecraft, who lived in Providence, RI, wrote a loosely-connected series of supernatural/horror stories which now define what is known as the "Cthulhu Mythos." (For more information, put "deep one" or "Cthulhu Mythos" or "HP Lovecraft" or any combination of the three into a search engine.) The most famous of these was "Call of Cthulhu" ("In his house dead Cthulhu lies dreaming"). One of the many races Lovecraft described were Deep Ones. These are intelligent, aquatic humanoids (something like the Creature from the Black Lagoon in looks) which are related to humans and can breed with them. Most writers portray Deep Ones as pure monster, but I have always been fond of them and written about them more sympathetically.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was in my dream for a while, and then I wasn't. In the beginning, I was in my friend Christine's car (she has a Dodge Neon) with a 3d person (who, don't know). We were uptown at the stop light in front of the post office trying to go left, but they were cutting down trees (from where I don't know, there's no trees around there) and the way was blocked. I guess Christine was trying to bring me home. She did some kind of crazy turn and went down Center St, only it was all snowy and she started skidding and the next thing we knew, we were up on the sidewalk in a way that shouldn't have been possible because of the parking meters (which don't exist in real life). The car is too wide to fit between the parking meters, but we were on the sidewalk! So we had to drive down the sidewalk to get to the next street.
But we didn't go to my house. We ended up in this very strange place. It was like a little peninsula or tongue of land into a swamp. There was a nice house, kind of Victorian but not really, and behind it a shop. I thought it was an ideal set-up, and I liked the house, which was long and low for a Victorian. (What a Victorian Painted Lady would look like if you built one in a swamp, I guess.) The shop had all kinds of things I like: t-shirts with sayings and pictures on them, wind chimes, dream catchers made with parrot and wild bird feathers, jeweled sun catchers, etc. This is where I vanish from the dream, left happily browsing in this store.
The woman in charge of the shop looked like Marge Simpson, but she was a person, not a cartoon. There was a man there too--her son, or nephew, some kind of relation.
The swamp appeared to be full of alligators (or crocodiles--I never understood what the difference was!) but the people from the shop didn't seem afraid, although they did watch the gator-crocs closely. The giant reptiles would show just the tops of their heads above the water-never their bodies, rarely their tails. And they weren't the regular black-green color, they were different colors. No, correction. They were the black-green color underneath, and then they had almost like highlights of other colors. The one I remember most had red mottling.
Others were browsing in the shop, trying on clothing, etc. Someone said something about the gator-crocs and the woman responded, "Those aren't gators, they're deep ones."
All the people in the dream knew what a deep one was, and everyone went to the water's edge to look (pretty stupid thing to do). The woman explained that for some reason, Deep Ones liked to breed in this swamp, and there were many rare hybrids. (Hybrids with WHAT? But hybrid just seemed to imply the various colors, not that they were cross-breeding with other species.)
The red one was especially active. It would come to the surface, look around, and submerge again. Apparently these Deep Ones did not come onto land much, or attempt to communicate with the people in any way except to watch each other.
By this time, Christine, our passenger and I had probably left. We just weren't in the dream anymore.
The man who lived there started hitting on one of the women who was shopping. He tried to kiss her, and her breath was extremely foul, so instead he had sex with her, right there on the Deep One's beach. (well, not a beach, more like a sloping river bank) The Marge lady saw what was going on and didn't say anything. Later on (the next day maybe?) she caught them having sex again, and there was an enormous Deep One watching, one so big she assumed it was actually a gator-croc for once and not a Deep One. She said to the man, as he was having sex with the woman (still not kissing her due to her breath), "maybe you should ask her on a date."
The enormous Deep One was golden in color, with little or no black-green underneath. It was some kind of next generation hybrid-hybrid and possibly something like a queen (like in Alien), very powerful and very smart.

And then the alarm went off. Damn those modern conveniences!

Monday, June 06, 2005

happy 5 chicchan

12.19.12.6.5 5 Chicchan 3 Zotz
2755 days until 12-21-2012

5: energy is increasing
Chicchan: Kundalini serpent enlightment energy. Do gentle exercises, read intermediate books, with the goal of enlightenment in mind. Serpent enery is also grouding, so if Ik left you feeling spacey, Chicchan should bring you back down.

distance

I feel very detached from everything and everyone. My husband has been making an effort to spend more time with me, but I feel like he's spending less. I feel very, very alone. I haven't gotten a OFS lesson in several months (since before I started this blog). I'm in a pit. I can't even hate--it takes too much effort.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Happy 4 Kan

12.19.12.6.4 4 Kan 2 Zotz

4: it's a square number, the four directions, the four elements, but it's low energy. Kind of grounded. You want to do things, but the couch is so soft.....this is especially true on a Kan day. Kan is the muse, tempting you to create with all sorts of ideas...but the couch is so soft, the air conditioning so cool...

Saturday, June 04, 2005

my pool of souls claims a life

I drove by the bridge today which I use to throw itza and offerings into my Pool of Souls, and there's two big flower bouquets there, so that bridge (the smaller of the two) is the one where the man died.

For when the link is dead, here's one story, from national news:

Man Killed In ATV Crash
WVIT-TV

WALLINGFORD, Conn. - Wallingford police are investigating Sunday night's fatal collision between two all-terrain vehicles near the Quinnipiac River that took the life of a Wallingford man. State police told NBC 30 that the two ATVs slammed into each other, sending one driver over a bridge and into the Quinnipiac River.

Joseph Whittaker, 28, was pronounced dead at Yale New Haven Hospital.

Local news:

Horbaty tries to come to grips with friend's death

By Dan Champagne, Record-Journal staff

WALLINGFORD — Roman Horbaty did everything he could to save his friend, but it wasn't enough. His friend is gone — the victim of an ATV accident on Sunday — and Horbaty is left to deal with the memory of being there and watching him die.

Joseph C. Whittaker Jr., 28, collided with the 30-year-old Horbaty as the two rode all-terrain vehicles west on Quinnipiac Street Sunday evening. Whittaker somehow lost control of his ATV. It swerved to the right, police said, and struck a metal guardrail. Whittaker flew over the front and fell into the shallow water of the Quinnipiac River, and it was Horbaty who ran to his aid, jumping into the river and keeping Whittaker's head above water until rescuers arrived.

Whittaker was taken by helicopter to Yale-New Haven Hospital, where he was pronounced dead.

"I just got down there and tried to save him," Horbaty said. "I saw his legs sticking out from the water, so I tried to get him up. The water wasn't deep. It was more mud than anything. The mud was knee-deep."

Whittaker, who followed in his father's footsteps and became a truck driver at Mitchell's Express Inc., will never get to say his wedding vows to fiancée Michele MacDonald, and he will never get to see his elementary school-aged son, Joseph C. Whittaker III, grow up.

Whittaker was riding Horbaty's ATV and Horbaty was riding an ATV that belonged to another friend when the accident happened, Horbaty said.

Horbaty recently had fixed problems with the carburetor on the ATV that Whittaker was riding, but he said he was "positive" that the repairs had nothing to do with the accident.

He recalled the moment of the crash. "I got bumped from behind," he said, "and I turned around and he was flying in the air. I pulled around and started yelling his name," Horbaty said, "and he wasn't responding."

Horbaty continued a short distance down Quinnipiac Street, unharmed. Whittaker flew over the front of the ATV and into the river, according to police. Neither man was wearing a helmet, Horbaty said.

The investigation is continuing, and police have already interviewed some witnesses, Lt. Alan Zakrzewski said Tuesday.

Horbaty said he and Whittaker had ridden from Horbaty's home at 3 Pequot Road to the Monte Carlo at Judd Square for a pig roast. They were returning home when the accident happened. Both Horbaty and his mother said alcohol was not involved in the accident.

"I know my son, and I can tell when he's been drinking, and I know he wasn't drinking," Gloria Horbaty said Tuesday. "I was hugging him and very close to him all night and he didn't smell of alcohol one bit."

Horbaty, who does heating and air conditioning work for SolvIt Inc., graduated from Sheehan High School in 1992. He and Whittaker had been best friends for about five years.

"He's reliving this nightmare all the time," Gloria Horbaty said of her son. "He had to go into that hospital room and say his last goodbyes to his best friend after he had already expired. He was not responsible, but he feels responsible."

In addition to his fiancée and son, Whittaker is survived by his mother, Denise Whittaker.

"He was such a sweetheart," Gloria Horbaty said of Joseph Whittaker. "He would come by and call me mom. He was like a part of the family."

"He had such a sweet personality," added Marilyn Wrinn, the officer manager at Mitchell's Express Inc. His father, Joseph Sr., had worked at Mitchell's before he died of a heart attack in April 2004. "He always had a big hello for everyone and was always willing to help if someone needed it. We're all just in shock."

Police are asking anyone with information about the accident or who might have witnessed Horbaty and Whittaker driving the ATVs earlier Sunday to contact Officer Christian Evans at (203) 294-2819.


Happy 3 Akbal

12.19.12.6.3 3 Akbal 1 Zotz

In 40 days it's my Mayan birthday, and in 34 or so days it's my other birthday. I think this is the closest they come together again.

Akbal is the place of transformation, and what my husband and I worked on today was transforming our yard. We are digging up the Circle, putting up concrete posts honoring the daysigns, re-doing the small garden & the cactus garden, putting junipers all along the side of the fence where the rat might have come from, and also in the front of the yard. My husband also wants to build a deck in the back yard, which will butt against the gardens, so we are thinking how that will work. I found a 4-leaf clover which I gave to my dragon ritual.

I decided NOT to go back to Kapulli Chaplin this weekend for another sweat. They are segregating the sexes and my husband wanted to come along.

Friday, June 03, 2005

first try at orange diet

It made me sick. I was passing bile all day, and my stomach hurt. Of course, yesterday my "friend" (period) chose to come back after a 2 month hiatus, and that may have contributed to my feelings of illness and general ickiness. My husband did much better--he ate 7 or 8 oranges, and lasted until 9:30 last night, when he had some popcorn. I had a regular dinner at around 5:30--I was about to pass out.

I did weight myself yesterday morning and again this morning. Showed that I lost 2 lbs. Not sure how accurate my scale is. I hate defining myself by numbers.

I discovered myself saying "ometeotl" every time I eat yesterday. Okay, I'll go with that.

Happy 2 Ik & Zotz takes the throne

12.19.12.6.2 2 Ik 0 Zotz Day 2/260

Zotz means bat in some dialects of Mayan. So the Bat god takes the throne today--that is the meaning of the 0 dates, the taking of the throne. I imagine the god of the previous month departing, nodding a greeting, and standing there respectfully while the next god settles in, maybe puts down a different cushion, puts the drink on the other arm of the chair, puts his feet up.

Ik is the Tree of Life, the great T which marks places of water. Water is the West, West is the Pool of Souls, the departed/dead, the ancestors. If you choose to build a Circle, as I have, your Tree should be to the West. The tree is called Wakah Chan (which I think I misspelled). All spent izta (candle wax, incense ashes, dead flowers) gets thrown into the nearest body of water to the west, which is your Pool of Souls. (I have previously written about my Pool of Souls, which is the Quinnipiac River. While I was away this weekend, it claimed a soul--some guy flipped his ATV over the bridge where I throw my offerings, and drowned.)

2 is very low energy. Not a day to commune with the dead.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

List of 1-Imix days

These are the rest of the Tzolkins from now to 2012, if you want to plan ahead!
6/2/2005
2/17/2006
11/4/2006
7/22/2007
4/7/2008
12/23/2008
9/9/2009
5/27/2010
2/11/2011
10/29/2011
7/15/2012

my day One activities

Today I am doing an orange fast. That does not mean exactly that I only eat things that are orange in color, but that I eat the actual fruit. (Which came first, did you ever wonder? The fruit or the color? Even in Spanish they are the same: naranja.) This is week 1 of the regimen reccomended by Tlakaelel.

Today I also start with my dragon magic ritual of honoring Queztalcoatl/Kukulkan. I have printed the portrait out on beautiful paper with a rainbow border. I have some beautiful golden brick Chinese prosperity incense and I think I will burn some of that for him, and I have a pound of white copal to offer, and of course Nag Champa. I have candles, and I can also do flowers. I don't want to do the same thing every day, and make it by rote, you know? If I was a god (or a dragon), that would bore me to tears.

So my first offering will be something that happened to me over a couple of days, a few months ago. I was teaching a Shamballa Multi-Dimensional Healing class, and as part of my classes I always channel a journey. During this journey, my students and I met this thin being in a white robe. The robe's hood hid his face. He was definately not human. I felt like he was an alien. He gave everyone some special energy and said we could call upon him when we needed to.

The very next day, I had a rebirthing session with my therapist, and he came to it. He squatted next to me, and the hood fell back from his face, and he was the oddest looking creature I'd ever seen. He looked a little like a stork, and a little like the Serpent People of HP Lovecraft, with a cobra-look to the neck. I described him to my therapist, and she said he was Thoth. He had weird energy though, both bird-energy and lizardy/snake (reptile) energy. He reached into my heart and put a diamond there, and also began to change his face. He turned into the native face I had see Kukulkan show himself to me as one other time, and let me know that the energies of the Feathered Serpent are also the energies of Thoth. Of course it seems so obvious once you know, doesn't it? Look at what Thoth did for Egypt and what the Feathered Serpents did for the Americas. Yup. Same energy, same being. Pretty amazing?

So in other words, I am not just doing dragon magic for the next 9 months or so, I am also worshpping Thoth. Should be interesting. I am already cleansing deeply from the oranges.

Happy new Tzolkin! 1 Imix...portal...day 1

12.19.12.6.1 1 Imix 19 Zip

1 is normally low energy. It can also mean inchoate energy. (I always liked that word and assiciated with Choate-Rosemary Hall, the expensive prep school near where I grew up, even though it's pronounced differently.) Or beginning energy, birth energy. Today is the latter two, not the former one. It's the first of the first.

Imix (Cipactli--water monster- in Aztec) is mother earth, turtle island, the crocodile who cares for her young so lovingly yet has a savage streak.

It's the first portal day of this Tzolkin, the first reaping, incoming portal day. Now all the things we prayed for and wished for in the last half of the previous Tzolkin cycle (130 days) will be coming to us.

Don't put off things until tomorrow. Start them today. It's a form of New Year's Day. Make resolutions. Be as you wish to be for the next 260 days. You want to sleep late, eat junk food, smack around your girlfriend? Go for it. You want to diet, exercise , read spiritual things, think happy thoughts? Go for it.

Ometeotl.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

(picture) Maestro Tlakaelel


Maestro Tlakaelel, giving a cooking lesson on Sunday afternoon. Posted by Hello

(picture) kitty friend


This cat, a permanent resident of Kapulli Chaplin, has crossed blue Siamese eyes and loves cars. The Siamese I had as a child loved cars too, and was almost as cuddly as this good boy, who told me he was a hunter--and he did bring at least one mouse offering that I heard of to those sleeping in the loft. A fabulous, friendly, playful, intelligent animal.Posted by Hello

weekend with Tlakaelel part 2

These are my initial impressions:
The "loft" room is the 3d floor of Kapulli Chaplin. It's a very large room (30' by 50'? I'm bad with distances) with wood flooring and exposed wood rafters, through which are woven branches. There's a lavatory tucked into the corner by the stairs. Skylights in the ceiling, couches, carpets, backjacks. A pile of blankets in the corner (later I learned they're for covering the sweat lodge). An altar between the far windows, with a glow-in-the-dark plastic skeleton in one window and a skull in the other (flat halloween-type decorations).
Maestro Tlakaelel (MT) is a little rotund man who walks with a cane and wears his long grey and black hair in a french braid. His face is weathered and round, and he does not look nearly 90 years old.
We started the first talk during the blue hour (when bunnies come out) and it rained & thundered starting immediately, so some of the words were obscured (both in translation & in Spanish).
The first story he told was that 8 years ago he was sick, and his students took turns caring for him every night. One night he woke up paralyzed, and saw beautiful flowers everywhere. He prayed to the Creator, saying that he had helped many people in his life, and prayed for many, and never asked for anything for himself or even for his sick mother. And now he was asking: if it was his time to die, he wanted to die, not to linger on paralyzed. He felt someone touch him, and thought it was Jose (the same Jose at the weekend) but it wasn't. Jose put his hand on one side of MT and the spirit hand was on the other side, and the healing went on for hours. When it was over, Jose had the gift of hands-on healing, and was able to teach all the other students in the Kapulli (the Mexican one, not the one in Chaplin). Later on, MT was in Germany and talked to someone about a Japanese healing method called Mari Kari, which is supposedly the same as Reiki, and that was what Jose had learned from the spirit that night.
The next story MT told was that he went for a walk on a moonlit night, and saw that he had two shadows, but there was only one moon and no other light. When he stood still, one of the shadows danced around him, and eventually they both danced. When he started walking again, one of them went away. But a few times the second one has returned.
Then he told a story of a collective vision at the Mexican Kapulli. Seven of his students were practicing native songs, and they heard a noise like someone walking on the building's tin roof. They kept singing and the sound moved and became like someone running around the outside of the building, and finally like someone inside the building. They lit some copal and the smoke revealed the forms of spirit children. The spirits did not like the copal and left.
Tlakaelel says there is no division between the physical/material world and the spiritual world. Without spirit, the material is nothing. Belief is necessary. Everything is a process--birth, life, death.
MT explained that all energy comes from space--and this is not fiction or fantastic. All ancient cultures worshipped the Sun as their father--not a god, but a font of energy. When the sun goes away in winter, the plants, animals, humans, Earth all rest. This is a time for people to be in their houses and learning from their elders. Between the winter solstice and the spring equinox, the seeds begin to wake up and grow as the sun's energy returns. The tiny antennae-like leaves point to the sun and gain energy through photosynthesis, and grow more leaves to get more energy. The plants absorb not only solar energy, but steller/galactic energy--stars, galaxies, planets. When the sun is balanced, we feel good, and everything we do has more energy. This isn't fantasy, that all original Earth religions were solar religions. Even in the Catholic church they have the Santismo, which is something like a gold disk that lives in a box and the priest takes it out and blesses the people with it. The Santismo represents the sun! (I used to be Catholic and I don't remember anything like that--only the box the host was in. But my husband was an altar boy and he said it sounds familiar, but it's not called the Santismo up here in New England.) This sort of thing is what the priests (he calls them "guides") of Tlakaelel's religion will teach. Right now he has 15.
Tlakaelel went on to say that most history we learn is wrong or incomplete, written mainly in response to wars, and written by the victor. Jesus said we are all children of god (hermanos). Great spirit, creator, grandfather, mystery, all that exists...and we are him. Cosmos=creator=us. He used a Nahautl term pronounced like "moyo koyani" which means "that which creates itself" (here I thought of the serpent that eats its own tail). Moyo Koyani is above/beyond time, because time is only in this (physical, material) dimension.
He urges us to think for ourselves, submerge ourselves in the essense of the cosmos.
We are going through a special place in the cosmos. New energies are entering the world. New people (like Indigos and Crystals and Psychic children, and that poor mermaid baby I suppose). It's a positive force. People are changing.
In answer to someone's question about her life path, he said that before we pick a path, we see many and try many.Some we see more clearly, and some seem very similiar. But all the paths are really just a very wide road leading to our destiny. We go back and forth from one side of that wide road to the other as if it were many small roads. But no matter what, we get there. Enlightment=illumination. All we see is part of the path. We should identify with the cosmos. We are not cosmic, we are cosmos. We are all one.
Ometeotl.
(that was 7 1/2 pages of notes, and it all happened on Friday night, 8 Men.

Happy 13 Ahau day 260 & portal!!

12.19.12.6.0 13 Ahau 18 Zip

This is it! The last day of this Tzolkin, the last portal day to send your prayers and energies and itza up to the gods to be fulfilled over the next 130 days.

Ahau--the lord flower, the highest and best, and also the end, the last. :(
But remember that from flowers come seeds (kan) and from seeds come new flowers!

Life is just a series of spirals, each one just slightly removed from the last. This is an ending and a beginning.

Tomorrow I start my Dragon Magic ritual with Quetzalcoatl/Kukulkan for 260 days.